4 reasons why we stay in dead-end relationships
Here in California spring is beginning to gain some momentum, and the large amount of rain is predicting a superb flowering season. And while spring is glorious and full of life and promise for most people, for some of us it can be a bit fraught.
Something that has been contracted within us throughout the winter wants to expand with the growing warmth, but bumps up against our inner limits. We have to face something within ourselves so we can “bloom” with the spring forces.
Sometimes that something has a name: checkmate.
The “Checkmate” is what happens in the game of chess when you lose. But thats part of the fun, ultimately.
In life, however, checkmates are also possible but they are definitely not fun.
Have you have ever found yourself in an impossible position but no matter what you try, you can’t seem to shift out of it and consequently you find yourself in the same dead end?
That is a checkmate.
But because you’re not in a game you have to keep going and try again – only to repeat the same outcome.
Here’s a story to illustrate:
A man woke up one morning and realized he hated his new job and the company culture there. He had left his other job for this one, but now found the same issues playing out that he had tried to leave behind.
What was worse, he had left ANOTHER job before his previous job — because of the same issues.
It was like Groundhog day, but at work.
Bureaucracies can create this kind of runaround where you have to have the official paper which you can’t get because you need another which you can’t get because you need the first…
Dead-end relationships can feel like that too. You can’t leave because the consequences are too destructive but staying isn’t an option either. Checkmate.
We get into this in our latest episode – the final of our 1st season.
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